I Had A Fight With My Husband’s Girlfriend And He Took Her Side
Our marriage was only a year old when I realized that my husband was cheating. I read messages between him and another girl. The words weren’t right. It wasn’t something you would expect from a married man. I wanted to confront the girl because she was someone I knew. She was around when we were dating. Those days I fought him to declare his stand with the girl. He said, “He’s only a friend, someone I’m trying to help.” The evidence was not clear from that point so I couldn’t hold on to anything to pin him down. I let it slide until the day I read those messages.
There were talking about a good time they’ve had. He said, “I wish we could do it again. I always think about it and I go crazy.” The girl responded, “What are you waiting for? Or you’re scared she’ll catch you.” He responded, “Catch me? She can’t. I’m only looking for a perfect moment. I wouldn’t like to be with you and be distracted.” The girl said, “This Saturday would be alright?” He said,” This Saturday is her birthday so let’s make it the next one.”
I confronted him with the message. I was brute. He was sober. I said, “You’ve always called her a friend so why this?” He didn’t have an answer. I asked, “How long have you been doing that with her?” He didn’t give an answer. His demeanor was apologetic. I told him, “I’m going to report this to your parents so they know the kind of man you are.” He said, “We are adults. We can solve our problems so why do you want to involve a third party?” I said, “Then give me answers. Why are you chasing after her? What am I not doing right that you have to go in for another?” He said, “I can’t explain. I’m sorry, it won’t happen again.”
I gave him his phone. I told him, “Call the girl. I want to hear you tell her that I’ve found out so it’s over.” He said, “That’s not necessary?” I said, “It’s very necessary. I want to believe you again. I don’t want to be haunted by my own forgiveness. Call her. I want to hear you two talk, then I will be free.”
He didn’t call. He told me he would send her a message. I told him I don’t want that. “I want to hear the two of you break up right in front of my eyes.” For days he didn’t do what I said so I withdrew from him. He tried to compensate with his actions but I wasn’t a fool. I knew what I wanted.
SO one day he said, “Fine. If that’s what you want I will do that.” I was there when he called the girl. He said, “Errrrm, my wife has found out about us and it’s breaking our marriage. So kindly let’s not do it again…” His words were not sharp enough. I wanted to hear some anger in his voice but that wasn’t coming so I shouted from behind him, “Stop chasing my husband and find your own. There are better men out there. Look for one and leave my own for me.” She dropped the line. He called again and she didn’t pick.
He looked at me and asked, “Are you happy now?” I said, “You should be happy that I didn’t leave you. what can you get from that girl that you won’t get from me? What don’t I do?” I wanted answers from him but it looked like he didn’t even know exactly what he wanted from that girl. One year later, I’d moved on from the hurt and pains caused by his infidelity. Not that I trusted him but the fact that he made an effort and did what I requested gave that false sense of security that he may do the right thing going forward.
In February this year, he did something that raised my suspicion again. I found two women’s perfumes in his bag. They were both wrapped, ready to be given out as a gift. My husband loves perfumes and he bought me different kinds of them whenever he had the opportunity. Because of him, I know the smell of a lot of perfumes because he kept changing my perfume. I thought those perfumes were for me. On Val’s day, I didn’t receive any of the perfume as a gift. All I had from him was a message talking about how strong our love had been an all. Those perfume didn’t find their way into my hand. “So where did the perfume go?”
Trust a woman to find out. She will search for the answer even if the answer is hidden under the rock of ages. This time it was hard for me. His phone had no messages and his call logs didn’t have any number that looked suspicious. But that didn’t stop me from searching. One evening we were watching tv when he fell asleep. I didn’t wake him up. I picked his phone and went to his Whatsapp. I saw Efe. The last message to her was about an hour old. I scrolled up. The chart wasn’t long. And all the chat happened hours ago. She asked, “Are you home?” He said, “Yeah, “I’m watching TV.” She asked, “So where is she?” He answered, “She’s here talking plenty.” She sent a laughing emoji. She asked him, “What did you take before coming to me today? You nearly killed me.” He sent a laughing emoji. He said, “I was missing you, that’s why.” She said, “Then miss me all the time…”
My heart was beating like a soldier who had been on the battlefield all day. All of a sudden I started sweating. “Who is this newcomer too?” I asked myself.” I tapped him, “Aboagye, who is Efe?”Immediately he woke up he started looking for his phone. When he saw his phone in my hands his mood changed. I asked again, “Who is Efe?” He gave me that familiar guilty look. I said, “So you won’t change? How many women do you want in your lifetime? I will leave so you can have as many as you want.” I threw his phone at him and left. That night I cried. I assessed everything that had happened over the years and asked myself the same question, “What did I do wrong?”
We didn’t talk for days. One day I saw a call on my phone. I picked it and it was a lady. Her tone wasn’t right. She asked, “Why did you read my messages? Did I send them to you? He’s your husband so he can’t chat with anyone. Never try that again with me because you won’t have it easy the next time. Why would you read a message that wasn’t meant for you in the first place.” I was like, ”Is that Efe? She said, “It doesn’t matter who I am. Stop reading our chats. If I want to chat with you, I’m not scared of you, I will send it directly to you.” Then she cut the line. I was shocked. “Eiii, the mouse has the audacity to come after the cat? This mouse is having special anointing to be able to do that.” For minutes I couldn’t close my mouth.
I called back severely and she didn’t pick. I wasn’t going to let her go just like that so I recorded a ten minutes voice note and sent it to her. I’ll be honest, five out of the ten minutes were all curses. That girl kicked me where it was sacred. I didn’t go after her because it wasn’t needful but she thought she could come after me? I called my husband and asked, “You gave my number to that your fianga girl?” You empowered her to disrespect me? In my own turf?” He kept asking what happened. I said, “We’ll meet in the house.”
READ ALSO: I Was The Invisible Hand That Snatched His Babies In His Dreams…
He came in the evening with a frowning face. He won’t even let me talk. He started ranting, “How could you send that voice note to her. You send curses to a woman and you think she won’t react?” I asked, “Who is reacting to what? She was the one who called me. I didn’t call her.” He said, “Liar! How could she call you if you didn’t insult her first.” I showed him the call history. “Is that not her number? Look at the time he called and check the time I sent her the voice note.” He said, “I thought you were an enlightened woman. How could you say all those filthy things in the voice notes?” “So you don’t care what she said to me, right? The fact that she called to insult me first doesn’t bother you right?” He said, “Let me tell you the truth, you’re uncouth if you could say all that is in the voice note. All this while I thought I married a well-mannered woman.”
He left me and went inside. The fight started at the beginning of August. As I’m writing this, we are still fighting. I called his parents and reported him. His father and mother had visited us, trying to instill peace but this man is still asking me why I could send the curses to his side chick. I asked him, “Yes I sent that to her, so would you divorce me? He said, “Wait and see.”
I’m here waiting. This is not a fight I will let him win. He’s trying to bully me to cover his shame but I won’t allow it. He goes to work and comes back anytime he wants. I’m not bothered because while he roams I stay behind and plan my next move. We won’t last till the end of the year, it’s obvious but I won’t let this go down easily.